Overcoming Addictive Behaviors
At the heart of every addictive behavior is an attempt to soothe pain.
Whether you turn to food, liquor, substances, gambling, shopping, perfectionism, exercise, overachieving, or relationships, many of us are addicted to something.
Whatever substance or behavior you’re addicted to, you probably felt a sense of relief the first time you turned to it. Whether it was the relief from feeling inadequate, lonely, or unlovable, this substance or behavior – at least initially – helped to fill the hole inside of you, and you felt better.
Then you started to turn to it more frequently, needing more and more, just to get that same, temporary relief.
But you never get enough and always want more.
Eventually, this pattern escalates, causing you more harm than relief.
Other people start to notice. That’s when you begin to hide your addictive behavior.
At the same time, you get more and more consumed in the never-ending cycle of craving it. Your compulsive behavior provides temporary relief, but you sink into guilt and shame for the consequences and the behaviors you engage in to use it.
It might seem that whatever substance, behavior, or person you are addicted to is the real problem. But the actual cause is that hole inside of you that happened long ago.
Maybe you felt insecure, invisible in your family, or had a painful loss. Or, if you experienced chaos or stress growing up, you may have turned to substances to numb the pain that wasn’t safe to feel at the time.
Freedom from addictive behaviors happens one day at a time.
When you are focused on the here-and-now.
Not stuck in the shame of the past or caught in fear of the future.
There are threes steps for creating the right environment to heal addictive behavior.
First, you acknowledge your addictive behavior. You can’t change a problem you won’t admit you have, and there is usually a lot of secrecy and shame with compulsive behavior. It is healing to acknowledge that what you’ve been doing isn’t working anymore and that you need help.
You abstain from the addictive behavior. Many 12-step programs offer free support with meetings around the clock. You will be welcome, understood, and surrounded by others who have overcome the same addictive behavior or are working to free themselves, too.
You commit to the support of a community to walk with you and hold you accountable. It is healing to have the collective power of a group supporting you. Meeting people just like you who were once struggling but now are free from their addictive behavior helps you realize that you are not alone and gives you hope, mentoring, and support.
How Does Holistic Counseling Help?
In our sessions together, I’ll help you:
- Identify your triggers, and heal the painful life experiences that caused you to turn to substances in the first place.
- Learn how to extend compassion and loving-kindness to yourself because every addictive behavior has shame at its root.
- Understand the direct connection between addictive behavior and trauma.
- Use a combination of deep breathing techniques, meditation, and visualization for stress relief.
- Discover somatic awareness and Gestalt techniques to help you identify and express feelings that your addictive behavior once numbed.
- Use IFS ( Internal Family Systems) to access inner resources and strengths inside of you and reconnect with your true Self, which is the part of you that has never been shamed, rejected, or hurt and has the resources you need to heal. Learn more by visiting the My Approaches page.
There’s a better way.
Let’s work together to help you overcome this addictive behavior.
We’ll discover the root cause of your addictive behavior, so you can finally be free, improve the quality of your relationships, have clarity about who you are and what you’re capable of, and enjoy life!
Call me now to schedule your free 15-minute consultation, so I learn more about how I can help: (813) 336-2173.
